Kelly Gibbons, artist and writer, about me

Thursday, January 29, 2004

by Kelci Gibbons

Today is my birthday. Yep, me an Oprah. She's older. She's 50 and I'm 37 today. I don't plan on working too much today either. I am only going to do things that I absolutely want to do. I busted my butt yesterday, so I think I deserve it anyway.

I'm even going to go to the past for this post. We're going back 3 years to my 34th B-day: (The last thing I wrote then seemed more appropriate to go first so I've done that.)

Writing a lot isn't my problem, writing well is.

Happy birthday TO ME! I am 34 years old today, and I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. Well maybe that's not entirely true, but I don't know how to get what I want. (I underlined that twice and highlighted it) I want to be a famous author. I want to write a book. I want that book published, and I want to earn a living writing. Trouble is I can't come up with a story for this book. Nothing seems right.

It's here again. Another year has gone by without any great accomplishments on my part. Yes, I've gone about the business of living day to day, and I have been happy, yet something is missing. I have the same job, same house, almost the same everything, except it's all another year OLDER. I really wish things could be different. I KNOW there is something better out there for me, I just don't know how to get it.

I think I have always had this problem. I can dream big, and I can see the possibility of those dreams coming true, but I don't know how to make them reality. I think I limit myself. I set myself up for failure, and I hold on to the old like a ratty old security blanket. If I could just let go of it, and tuck it away in my fond memories box, I know I could finally escape. The problem is I CAN'T. I hate that word. I hate the limit it automatically implies. I CAN NOT is better because at least you CAN not do something.

OK we're back to 2004: A funny thing happened that year, I started saying I CAN. After that things started happening.

I wrote down four things that I wanted that year:

1. Write a book
2. Quit your job
3. Pay off all debt (credit card debt--I still have the mortgage)
4. Get a new car

I've done 3 out of the four. The only thing left is to write that book. And that is what I plan to do. Now I know I can.

posted by Kelly @ 1/29/2004 07:42:00 AM

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