| Thursday, May 27, 2004 |
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Proof of Miracles? Well not exactly, but notably strange occurrences have been happening in my part of the world.
*My son made a special request for his lunch last night, and I remembered it this morning, before I made the lunch.
*I used a job johnny (port-a-potty see comments) at the park and it didn't smell bad, honest, and--I'm going out on a limb here--it was clean. It is entirely possible that I was the first person to use it.
This has never, ever happened before!
*I showered, dressed (not back in PJs), and did my hair before the kids came home from school. And I didn't have anywhere special to go. I might even put make-up on and put my contacts in. I'm feeling a little crazy here. Hmm, this is a good plan, it might make the kids wonder where I've been all day.
*I feed the dog and gave her water before she started jumping around, wagging her tail and staring at me. She didn't do it once. I just remembered all on my own. I even let her out this morning before she did the let-me-out-now-or-else dance.
*I bought a fern a few months ago, and it's still alive--well most of it anyway.
*It's Thursday I have only been to the store 3 times this week. Usually at this part of the week, I've been there at least seven times--I ALWAYS forget something.
*I had pictures developed the same week they were taken. It was strange to see pictures of the kids at age they are right now. Usually film developing is a walk down memory lane.
*I had to mail letters this week, and I had stamps, for every one.
*I registered a product and sent in the warranty. I don't think I have ever done that. I usually remember when the warranty has expired for two years and the product breaks. OK, so I bought it in January, but still, it counts. I did it.
*Along the same line, I bought a new printer on Saturday that entitles me to a rebate, and I sent it in already. Really in less than a week. I truly think that is a miracle. Wait a minute, backing up one. I also registered the product. Wait a minute, that's a double miracle. Call the Pope, we've got ourselves a Saint here! |
posted by Kelly @ 5/27/2004 10:56:00 AM   |
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| Wednesday, May 26, 2004 |
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Duck, Duck, Goose!
In Spain you run with the bulls. In Pennsylvania I run with the geese. I've run with them for weeks without incident. Today was a little different.
I run at a small recreation park that has a soccer and baseball field. It is surrounded by a gravel track and it sits next to a pond. Their are about thirty wild geese that inhabit the pond. They also like to use the soccer field.
Usually when I arrive the geese are sitting in the center of the soccer field. The mama ducks with their babies usually kept a great distance from me and most of the time they would run away at the sight of me. The rest of the flock will make some noise when I start running, and sometimes they become alarmed by my presence and one of them will start the warning honk. This usually ends with most of them flying away to the pond. Usually though they sit on the field and if I get too close they all get up together and start waddling away. As soon as I go past they go right back to where they were.
I laugh at this because I guess they don't think I'll make it back around--hey I don't blame them, for awhile there I had my doubts too.
Today, when I arrived every duck was on the field. The mamas and the babies were there too. We had some rain over the last two days, and a thunder shower a few hours before I ran, so the track had some areas that were under water. The geese were hanging out by the big puddles.
The first few times I ran around, the ducks did their usually waddle away come back routine. But, then the babies started to swim in the puddles. I know how mamas are about their babies, so instead of bothering them, I ran on the outside of the track around a bunch of picnic tables set up on the side.
One mama duck really didn't care how courteous I was trying to be. She started hisses at me and getting a little too close for comfort and I started to get a little scared. I was close enough to see she had teeth and I wasn't about to find out if they would hurt. My heart was already pounding from the running, these geese really didn't need to help me out in the aerobic department.
After I got past the killer attack goose, I picked up a rock. I only planned on using it if I really had too. As I ran the next lap I plotted my plan of attack. If the duck actually came at me I throw the rock at it to scare it off, or maybe I would throw it as I approached to scare it away before there was a problem. Then I started thinking about an alternate plan.
Last time I ran past I thought maybe I got of the track to early and didn't make enough noise for the geese to hear me. So, as I started to approach I started kicking the rocks and making more noise. "Comin' through geese. Here I am. Get moving." Yes, I was saying it out loud. Thankfully no humans were close by.
All this did was attract their attention, and this time there were more babies in the puddle. I started around the picnic tables again, but Mother Goose was watching every move I made. Then was some serious fear in my eyes.
The goose started hisses again. I clutched my rock and started to run faster. I'll use this if I have to you angry beast! I kept running and the goose kept hissing, but I managed to escape again.
I started thinking maybe I should get out of there, run for the car and not come back, but being the dedicated runner that I am I kept going. To my delight, as I approached the third time, the geese were walking away. Yes, freedom, thank you very much. It's hard enough trying to run with the wildlife giving you grief too.
I finished my run and headed to the car thinking I had one. I looked fear in the eye and I came out victorious. Those geese were no match for me. Guess who was camped out at my van? You got it, the man eating, killer attack goose and her friends.
My heart started pounding. I started walking real slow. Our eyes met. Now what am I going to do. Before the goose knew what was coming, I ran for the car--thank God I left it unlocked. Safe at last. Honk if you feel stupid! I honked the horn all the way home. |
| posted by Kelly @ 5/26/2004 12:27:00 PM |
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| Tuesday, May 25, 2004 |
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If anyone manages to get here today and read this, please drop the www before my blogger posts to any links you have listed (mine and others). Every once in a while, I experience this problem with blogger where having the www before my link causes it to be unavailable. Maybe when they made the changes this was something that I was supposed to do, but I never received notification and I don't have time to check support all the time. But, this happens all the time, so to avoid the problem in the future, I am changing all my links now. Some in my archives might be this way to, and eventually I might get to them, but for now I am concentrating on the main page. Sorry for the inconvenience. Hey, what am I sorry for, it's not my fault!
I bet you think I drank so many Pina Colodas that I thought I was on permanent vacation. Sorry, not true. Lately I don't feel like writing here all the time. I feel like I say the same things over and over and I feel like my writing is uninspired. So I don't write, then I feel guilty because I don't write, then I start to worry if I'm losing it as a writer. See what I mean, vicious cycle.
I have been feeling the same way about doing my SunnyK cartoon too. I like doing it, but only when I feel like doing it. When I force myself to do a cartoon, just to make sure one is there everyday, I lose the joy for doing it.
Some days I feel like doing more than one post or cartoon, and then there are other days that I don't feel like writing or drawing a thing. Even writing a shopping list is a burden on those days, and that scares me. What happens if writing does become a full time job? Will I act the same way then?
Or maybe it is just a time of rest. Kind of a rest when your tired thing. We will have to see.
I've got some updates for you:
Running- I'm feeling great about running, very confident that I will reach my goal of running for 3 miles. I'm even thinking about entering a race when I am done with the 10 weeks of training. I won't be entering it to win, just as a celebration of being able to do it.
When I first started, at the end of each week I worried that I wouldn't be able to increase my running times as I progressed. When I ended a week, I still didn't feel strong enough. I felt I was struggling with the shorter time and there would be no way that I would be able to run longer.
I didn't give up though. I told myself that I could do it, even if I had to jog at a snail's pace. I reminded myself that it wasn't a race that all I had to do was finish. It didn't matter how fast or slow I went. And, surprisingly to me, this worked. I continue to increase my running times, and every week I feel stronger and more confident. This week I knew I would be able to do the increased time. I didn't have any doubts like I did starting other weeks.
As I ran the first 8 minutes I looked at my watch less, and thought about things other than running. I was doing it and not thinking about it, and it felt great. I had heard people talking about being in "the zone," but as a non-athlete, I had no idea what they meant. I felt it yesterday. I even ran longer than my training called for without even realizing it. That feeling gave me a renewed sense of confidence. I knew without a doubt that at the end of 10 weeks I would be able to run 3 miles.
I'm not there yet. I still have 5 weeks to go and I know it will get harder as I continue, but something is changed it me. I really feel that I can do this. No fear. No doubt. I can do this. I will do this.
Volleyball:
Yes, this is a Varsity Letter!
The Volleyball season has come to an end for my son, Brian. It wasn't the best season with a record of 7 wins and 9 losses, but sometimes it isn't all about winning.
For those of you that don't remember, he almost didn't make the varsity team. In the beginning he didn't he was the 10 guy when they needed 11. He also got "punished" in the beginning of the season for missing one practice because he had to work .The coach seemed to forget that he had been to every other practice, and that he had to go to work so he could get the day off for the game.
Anyway, he ended up on the varsity team. He started every game but one, and he played in every game. On the last game of the season one of the senior's dad came up to me and said, "If I got a vote for most improved player, it would go to Brian. He has come a long way this season. He is doing a great job."
Volleyball has given this kid so much confidence. He has made so many new friends. My Brian has always had a hard time fitting in but he found his place with this team. It's good to beat to your own drum, but the beat also sounds good with a band.
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| posted by Kelly @ 5/25/2004 05:42:00 AM |
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| Friday, May 21, 2004 |
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| Life is good. It is Friday afternoon, I have finished my work for the week and it is sunny and hot. If the cover was off the pool, I'd go for a swim. Instead I am going to make myself a Pina Coloda and I'm go to sit in the sun and do absolutely nothing. This my friends is living the dream. There was a time in cubicleville that I could only imagine a day like this. Have a wonderful weekend! I'm of to enjoy the rest of the day. |
| posted by Kelly @ 5/21/2004 01:27:00 PM |
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| Thursday, May 20, 2004 |
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In a recent comment, Bridgett asked, "Will you do a brag blog one of these days? Some shameless self-promotion? I'd love to hear how things are going for you professionally these day. I know they're good, but I want the details! You are way too humble; brag a little! I'm interested!"
It made me feel great that someone else is interested and wants to hear what's going on. I do have a problem with self-promotion because I never want to cross the line or want people thing I am a bragger. I want people to know what I'm doing, but how far do I go? I actually think that might be some of my problem with recent offline friendships. I have told people about illustrating the book and I don' get much of a response other than, "Oh, that's great. I didn't know you were talented."
Well thanks, do you want see it? Do you want to buy a copy? Do you want to know how I happened to become the illustrator? Would you like to know what else I'm working on?
The lack of interest makes me feel bad. It also stops me from telling them about other successes because I really feel that they don't care. Something else that stops me is my constant need to justify what I'm doing. "No, it doesn't pay much, but...Hey, I'm living my dream."
That leads to another question. I don't ever remember having to disclose my pay when I was a waitress or a customer service rep. Why should I have to now. No, I'm not making a lot now, but most business AREN'T profitable in the first few years.
Now, back to Bridget. I wasn't going to respond, because there isn't much to tell. I had some great beginners luck. The first six articles I sent were published, most of them for pay, and the first time I attempted art, I was asked to illustrate a book. It has been slow since then. Very slow.
I have submitted several queries and articles for consideration and I have gotten a few nice rejections and several non-responses. Even the local magazine where I got my start isn't interested at this time. Yes, Toni, I did try again. I have sent art work to several greeting card companies. Again, more NO THANK YOU. The one positive note is that I sent artwork to an online magazine and they are keeping it on file for a possible future assignment. So, that was encouraging.
Oddly, I'm not discouraged or ready to give up. This I am seeing is the way it is. I will continue to write and draw and submit. I have said this a thousand times, and I will say it a thousand more if necessary, persistence pays off. Someday, someone out there will buy my work.
Right now, I am doing freelance web research again. It pays, I still get to work at home, and it leaves time for my creative pursuits. So, it makes me happy. I am working on two writing assignments. One is for a creative writing class and the other is for possible pay. I'm enjoying both of them and I am enjoying not having "too much on my plate." God I hate that quote, I heard that way too much in cubicle land!
I have decided not to overwhelm myself with writing assignments and instead concentrate on one or two at a time. I will work on queries and stories as they come to me and I will keep at all of it. I know with out a doubt that someday this will all pay off and doing it my way will make me a better, happier person.
So Bridgett, thanks for believing in me, thanks for asking, and stay tuned for updates. Believe me, when something good happens, I will share. I'd love to.
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| posted by Kelly @ 5/20/2004 06:08:00 AM |
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| Wednesday, May 19, 2004 |
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Kelci is my oldest daughter. She's older than her sister by whole 12 minutes. She is one terrific kid who accomplishes many great things, but she always seems to get over shadowed by someone else. I feel so bad for her at times, because she is so remarkable, but never gets the credit she deserves.
It started at birth. Kelci has always been very easy going and laid back. Michelle is a bit more high struck, a little more maintenance required. Michelle always stole the show, and when they were small that was OK with Kelci, but as she gets older I can see that it hurts her. And it isn't only her sister who steals her glory.
When they were little Michelle was always accident prone and required a great deal of attention. She always managed to do something to get herself into trouble which resulted in several trips to the emergency room. Granted this isn't good attention, but it is attention non the less. Kelci once wish she could get hurt so she could get her turn at hospital attention.
Two years ago she got her wish. She was playing soccer and fell and broke her arm. Guess what her sister did 24 hours later? You got it, she broke her arm. Poor Kelci couldn't even have that one. Her arm was no longer the center of attraction, the fact that "the twins" broke their arms within 24 hours of each other playing the same sport was the new in thing.
Things like that always happen to her. Someone always manages to beat her out by the smallest of margins. Her dad and I always make sure to tell her how proud we are of her and how special and unique she is and how much we think of her achievements, but some how it isn't the same.
On Saturday she was in the District Track Meet. She qualified in 5 events but could only do 4 (the most allowed). She won medals in all 4 events. Third place in high jump. Third Place in the 400m sprint. 5th place in the 4 x 100 relay and 1st place in the 4 x 400 relay. Plus her team took the district championship. She won the most medals of anyone on her team and I am pretty sure she added the most points to her team score. But guess who made the paper? Her best friend who took 1st place in the 400 and a team mate who got a district record in the javelin. Oh yea, and in the small print where her wins were listed guess how they spelled her name? Kelli--the same thing they did on her 1st place Basketball trophy.
Can you guess who she got mad at? Me, of course for giving her a name that is spelled odd--people always want to change it to Kelly and that is not what I ever intended when I named her Kelci. I like the name and I loved the way it was spelled. I especially loved where I found it. It was in the center of a star on a mural in the maternity wing of a hospital. And the mural was painted by the first person I took art lessons from.
From the moment Kelci was born she was my star and she always will be, just for being her.
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| posted by Kelly @ 5/19/2004 05:53:00 AM |
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| Tuesday, May 18, 2004 |
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I don't want this post to come across as a feel sorry for me post, because it is not at all what I want. It is an observation and I felt like putting it here.
I don't have any close friends. Throughout my whole life I have had good friends, but they always seem to come in stages. I had my elementary school best friend, my junior high best friends, my high school best friends, my before I was married best friends, and my work best friends. I always seems that when I move on to something different I leave my friends behind.
These are people that I did everything with, that I was so close to I shared everything with them. We went everywhere together, we talked on the phone all the time, we went on vacations together. These were real friends that I shared secrets and dreams with, that I made plans with, that I thought would be in my life forever. There was never a fight between us, there was never a bad ending with any of them. I moved on to something else and then they were gone.
When I see any of these people now we can pick up where we left off. We can laugh and talk like we saw each other yesterday, but we never follow through. The end of the conversation is always, "We have to stay in touch, this was so much fun." But, we never do.
When I left my last two jobs I promised myself this wouldn't happen. I promised myself I was going to keep in touch with people. I wasn't going to allow anymore friendships to slip away. For awhile I did. I would stop by my friends house or at work to say hi, I would call occasionally and I would send emails. I made sure I didn't make the stops all about me. I would even take my one friend silly gifts for no reason. I would see something and it would remind me of her so I would by it. None of this helped.
I don't get any phone calls, or emails, and no one stops by. My closest friends are my family and some internet pals. I am not dishing this because they are wonderful, but I can't help but wonder why I can't keep real friends.
Some people have suggested that it's my zodiac sign (Aquarius) and that it is just the way I am. But, I live with 3 other Aquarians and they don't seem that way at all.
I have thought of so many reasons but none make sense. Then I start to thing its me. Maybe I do something or say things a certain way that pushes people away. But I can't think of anything that I do. I have even asked people, and they say no. Is everyone that busy in life that real friendships don't matter anymore?
I don't think that is it either, because I know other people who don't have this problem.
I have also tried to find new friends that are doing the same thing that I am, but that wasn't too successful either.
The strange things is that I know so many people and they all seem to like me. But I can't seem to have anything other than acquaintances. I really wish I could figure out the character flaw I posses that would change this. I would love to have one of those friends that is there for life. |
| posted by Kelly @ 5/18/2004 05:33:00 AM |
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| Monday, May 17, 2004 |
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A very scary thing happened to me at the dentist office today. I had the girls in for their regular check-up and when I got their next appointment in 6 months, I noticed it was the day before my son's birthday and said, "That's the day before Brian's 18th birthday."
Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. In six months I am going to be the parent of an adult. Me! In my heart and mind I am not even an adult myself and I am going to be the mother of one in less than a year. How the hell did this happen?
The supporting, comforting daughter that I have says, "So, on my next birthday I'm going to be 15."
What?!
Sometimes hearing it out loud makes it too real to handle. When they were babies everyone warned me that in a blink of an eye they would be grown-up. I didn't believe them. I don't even think I blinked my eye, and here I am 15 years later with three very grown-up teenagers.
Not very long ago my baby was struggling to ride a bike without training wheels and today he is driving to school. In a year he will graduate and head off to college. In six months he will be old enough to vote and to be drafted. My baby is not old enough for that.
 
On Friday night I watched my daughters go off to their first "Big" dance wearing semi-formal gowns and high heels and looking much older than I even imagined they could. The neighbor even came out and commented that he had to look twice when he saw them, because he wasn't sure if it was them. What happened to those two little tomboys with blonde pig tails and snakes wrapped around their arms?
I don't care what anybody says, this still doesn't mean I have to grow up!
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| posted by Kelly @ 5/17/2004 09:32:00 AM |
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| Sunday, May 16, 2004 |
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Sometimes you can't do everything. That used to bother me, but I am learning to like it. There is only so much I can do in a day and I used to go crazy when I couldn't get everything I wanted today. But somewhere along the line, I learned that there is always tomorrow. You do what you can do and that is enough. Trying to do to much will make you crazy.
I have also learned that I like to be busy. This might sound odd, but I am calmer when I have more things to do. I can schedule my time better and get more things done.
I know I have been quiet here this week, but I have continued to get the things done that I needed (and wanted) to do. I finished my work deadlines, I also wrote, painted and continued my running schedule. And in addition to all of this I had an extremely busy week with the kids. This included 2 volleyball matches (one 4 hours long), a chorus concert, track practice, district track meet, and the "big" dance for the girls.
Even though it was hectic, I felt calm, productive and happy. The more I did the more energy I had to do other things. This made me think how little I accomplish when I sit and worry about it instead of just getting up and doing it.
I sometimes forget what a simple concept "Just do it" is. I spend so much time worry that I am not going to have enough time to do everything that I forget that the best way to get things done is to JUST DO IT!
Running Update:
I finished week 3 (4x 5 min. run, 2.5 min.). Out of 30 minutes I am running 20 and walking 10. I didn't think I could do it. I worried as I started the week that I would never be able to finish this schedule, but I kept reminding myself that this wasn't a race. I needed to go slow and finish. I didn't need to worry about how fast or far I went. There will be time for that later.
I also ran with Ray once this week and ran at a park in front of strangers. These are two things I would not have considered three weeks ago because I was so self conscious. The physical strength was expected, but the mental strength is a bonus. |
| posted by Kelly @ 5/16/2004 03:48:00 PM |
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| Wednesday, May 12, 2004 |
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I would definitely go to a meetings for compulsive computer users who think they know what they are doing and actually have no clue. I'm sure I would also need to go to a self esteem building meeting after this one, because chances are it would be called something like "Computer Idiots Unite," and the first line everyone would use would be, "I'm such an idiot." I know that's what I'd say.
This is in regards to installing things and trying to update. I have stopped myself at actually taking the computer apart and trying to upgrade. That's one blessing, because I do enough damage with software, can you imagine what I could do with a screwdriver and a hard drive. That is one scary thought.
I had the brilliant idea--wait, I just went along for the ride now that I think of it--of upgrade our windows operating system. Now that I really think about it, I had no intention of doing anything to the computer. Someone suggested we upgrade, bought the product, and went fishing. I'll give you a hint his initials are R-A-Y. He left me to do the easy install. How hard could it be?
72 hours later and 2 customer service calls to India-BTW it is 115 degrees there and you can fry and egg on the top of a car-I found out it is impossible (at least on my computer). The best part of these two extremely long calls was ho they ended. After about 4 hours on the phone, and being told I am the "Chosen one," because the problems I was having "just don't happen to anyone else," when I was just about to be instructed on how to do that one last thing that should solve the problem, my cordless phone when dead and I got a black screen. So, I did what any other "chosen one" would do. I cried. I uninstalled. I gave up. I decided that what I have now is good enough. Then I went onto the website for my computer and found out that it was never meant to happen.
I should have gone there first because they had a nice article intending to help. In their words, "The purpose of this document is to help minimize frustration and surprises if the decision is made to upgrade to Windows XP. Anyone considering this upgrade should do so carefully. Many HP Pavilion Desktop PCs may meet the minimum requirements recommended by Microsoft for upgrade to Windows XP, however, upgrading is not recommended for all HP Pavilion Desktop PCs, especially where the base platform has not been tested and qualified by HP for use with Windows XP."
I have an older computer--anything over a year old is generally old in computer terms--and as long as I leave it alone it works just fine, so that is exactly what I plan on doing from now on. It does what it needs to do at the moment and I ain't gonna push its buttons anymore. |
| posted by Kelly @ 5/12/2004 06:04:00 AM |
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| Tuesday, May 11, 2004 |
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OK, it isn't much of a post, but it is something:
A Running Update:
I completed week 2 on Saturday. I felt great about doing it because I ran as much as I walked. I was scared about going into week 3 which is Run for 5 minutes and walk for 2.5 repeating 4 times. But I did it and it felt great! 3 more days this week, but I am confident I will be able to do it. I feel more powerful every time I complete a day.
And another plus, the husband might give it a try to--that's a shocker! The down side to that: He is 6'3" tall, can we all say LONG LEGS! I will have to really run, not jog to keep up! |
| posted by Kelly @ 5/11/2004 07:58:00 PM |
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Hi All
This is a little update to let you know I might not be updating for a few days--I didn't want any of you to worry. There I go thinking I am so important, again!
I have paying work this week, so that will be a priority. Go me! The husband is on a vacation, so fun might also be a priority. And I have been in update Hell on this computer, so anything to do with this computer is not a priority at the moment. After 3 days, and about 5 hours on several customer service call I found out that the upgrade I am attempting is probably not possible. OK, the blood pressure is rising so I am going to end this post right now.
I'll be back soon. Have a great week! |
| posted by Kelly @ 5/11/2004 12:49:00 PM |
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| Sunday, May 09, 2004 |
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Since it is Mother's Day, I thought it would be appropriate to say a little about my mom. I have always liked those 100 things about me posts, so I thought I'd put a spin on it and do one about my mom. I chose 37, one for every year Patricia McCue has been my mom.
37 Things About My Mom:
1. My mom has beautiful blue eyes.
2. She is a nurse. She put her self though Nursing school when I was a kid. She did this as a single parent while working full time and raising three kids and not getting child support from my father.
3. She graduated from a Catholic High School, and hated it. She has never gone back to a High School reunion. She didn't make me go to a Catholic High School.
4. My mom adores animals and right now she has a dog, 6 cats, 2 horses and a pony (the horses live with my brother).
5. My mom can pull a horse trailer and even back it up. Hey that's impressive to me!
6. She is a certified Angel Therapy Practioner. She reads angel cards and she's really good at it. I've even had people tell me that she's an angel on earth. I prefer to think she is a messenger, I think she does too!
7. My mom is very creative, and she only started painting a few years ago. She painted a beautiful mural of the ocean on her living room wall. She doesn't think she is an artist, but she is.
8. When I was a kid, we didn't have a lot of money, but my mom always made sure we got to do cool things--like art lessons and riding horses (we even had a pony.)
9. My mom once built a raft with 4 other people and rode it down the river in a raft race. It was made from 50 gallon barrels. She didn't win.
10. My mom loves to ride horses, and she has owned a pony or a horse for most of her life. Her first pony was Jimmy, and I think her first horse was Tony (a paint horse she used to ride bare back and pretend she was an Indian).
11. My mom won a truck in a radio contest. She said she knew she would win--she has visualized it.
12. My mom's name is Patricia. You can call her Pat, but don't ever call her Patsy, she hates that name. That's what she was called as a child.
13. Every year for Christmas my mom dresses up as Mrs. Claus and passes gag gifts out to everyone. Everyone knows who she is, but we all play around and pretend she is really Mrs. Claus.
14. My mom dressed up for many occasions including Halloween and has come up with some hysterical outfits. Once, on no special occasion, she dressed up as an old woman and knocked on a few neighborhood doors. Thank God they were relatives.
15. My mom laughs a lot. She's very funny and she's a great story teller if she can get it out without laughing.
16. When I was 14 my mom let me go to California to meet my pen-pal.
17. My mom is tiny, but she is very strong.
19. She is very friendly. Everyone likes her. Every time I meet someone who knows my mom, they gush over her. She is also quiet and soft spoken (unlike me!)
20. She once completed a Native American survival course. I don't know the details, but I know it was pretty intense.
21. She used to have a full sized tee-pee set up in her back yard.
22. She is very open minded and is always trying new things.
23. When I was a kid I was very messy (I still am) and my room was a disaster. Instead of yelling at me she bought me a poster that said, "Cleanliness is a sure sign of a sick mind!"
24. She wanted to join the peace Corp, but my grandparents wouldn't let her. She became a secretary instead and then got married.
25. My mom is the oldest of three sisters. Her youngest sister passed away five years ago.
26. I always thought her favorite color was green, but lately she's into purple.
27. Her favorite flowers are Impatients.
28. She hates when tree's are cut down. It makes her sick.
29. Two of her favorite TV shows were Magnum PI and McGyvier (sp?). She used to watch them in re-runs. I think most of the TV she watches is in re-runs!
30. My mom has also taken classes in hypnotherapy. And she can hypnotize people for weight loss and smoking cessation.
31. She is the mom of three (2 girls and a boy) and a grandma to 8 (4 and 4). I am her favorite, Kelly.
32. She would love to own a Jeep Liberty. If I could I would buy it for her, because she has always been so generous to me.
33. She didn't freak out when I got a tattoo. I think that is pretty cool. She didn't say to much when I had purple hair either. She survived me. That's pretty amazing.
34. I might get killed for saying this, but she has natural red hair. She hated her red hair and dyes it blonde. I think she looked great with red hair.
35. She would love to swim with the dolphins.
36. And she loves the ocean.
37. She is the greatest mom in the world, and I am honored to be her daughter.
I love you mom, Happy Mother's day!
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| posted by Kelly @ 5/09/2004 07:43:00 AM |
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| Friday, May 07, 2004 |
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I love it when the planets are all aligned properly and things work out like I want them to. It puts a very large smile on my face.
This is no big, earth shattering thing, but it makes me happy. That means it is important (to me anyway). The editor I do freelance web research for contacted me yesterday to offer me work. Work that pays. I like that.
I was ready to go out and get a part time job, something temporary until I got more writing and art jobs. The only thing that bothered me about that was that I would not be working at home. I really like working here in my PJ's being able to work when I want, take breaks when I want, exercise when I want, pet my dog if I feel like it, and not feel guilty when I do these things. I always hated it in cubicle world when I would work my ass off for hours, eat my lunch at my desk, never take a break, but the moment I had 30 seconds to relax because some how I managed to catch up a little bit my boss would come by and give me the look. If you don't have anything to do I'll find work for you. This look from the same boss who always seemed to find time for her smoke breaks.
Oops, I was getting a little negative there. Sorry, that happens when I think about cubicle world.
Back to reality. Taking this job doesn't mean I am giving up writing or art. It might mean posting less and scheduling my time better. As soon as I found out I had more work, I wrote a list of things that were important to me and that I must find time to do even if I am working. I refuse to let the fun stuff slide because I will be working.
Writing, art, exercise, and fun were all on the list before work, so I will make sure to keep them an important part of my day. Maybe I will go back to the old rule of doing them first so I make sure they get done. I am posting a sign at my desk that asks, "Did you write today? Did you paint today? Did you exercise today? Did you have fun today? If the answer is no, then get up now and do it!" Why do we never forget to work?
In the weeks before I escaped cubicle world, I posted a quote at my desk that read, "Everything changed the day she figured out that there was exactly enough time for the important things in her life." I thing it is one of the things that motivated me to get out of there. I started doing the things that mattered. I made them the priority. Taking this work is what I need to do right now so I can continue to do writing and art. It has value and it will provide me with things I need (such as money to buy art supplies and money for peace of mind). |
| posted by Kelly @ 5/07/2004 07:21:00 AM |
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| Thursday, May 06, 2004 |
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Cele-a-brate good times, come on!
OK, I admit it, I was a junior high cheerleader in the late seventies, so every time I think about celebrating, that song goes through my head with visions of the pom-pom "snake" my squad created for our routine. It was sad, but back then I thought I was pretty cool--not cool enough to make the High School team though. Ah, but that is another issue.
I'm celebrating today because the Science Fair is officially over today! I hated the Science Fair when I had to participate and hate it even more as a parent. For God's Sake why do they make them do this. My daughter's have been stressing over these projects since January. Or maybe it has been me stressing over the fact that they have been procrastinating since February.
Today, however, is the end. Today they will be judged. Today I celebrate. No more tri-folds, no more fights with the printer as we try to print 17 copies of the bloody report as the bus comes down the street. Does the science teacher, English teacher, each judge and the custodian really each need their own copy of my daughter's brilliant research on which type of hockey stick hits the ball harder? They will be too busy building their own hydroponic growing station to care about that. I should warn them up front that it is just a quicker way to kill plants. But, hey, we had to learn for ourselves, so they are on their own. We have contributed to the economy so no it is their turn.
Really what did the girls learn through all this. Kelci knows that growing plants in soil is better. Yes, this is something new to her because all the plants grown in soil around here die quickly. Michelle learned that if you do all your research pictures in one night, you have to change your clothes half way through so it looks like you did it on different days. And also that you can crop flowers out of pictures with photoshop. A great trick since the project should have been done when there weren't any in bloom. They both learned that the $3.00 tri-folds are just as good as the $12.00 ones and that practicing a speech can be almost as traumatic as actually giving one.
Here's some questions I still have:
Why did my daughter choose to compare field hockey sticks? She is not going to buy one based on this research, she will buy the one everyone else has with the most expensive price tag.
Why did we have to buy the more expensive pink gravel for Kelci's project if she didn't actually have to bring the thing to school?
It did brighten up the basement, but honestly, I could have just changed the rock colors (photoshop again) for the pictures to say a few bucks.
What are we going to do with the 3 foot high tri-folds after today?
I already have enough of them stored in the attic and I have no younger children to pass them down too--besides the same teacher's will still be there in 20 years so they can't be re-used. Maybe I can sell them on eBay (they say anything sells there).
How long are the remains of these projects going to sit in my family room and on my deck?
My guess is until I trip over one of them again, lose my temper and throw it across the yard!
If this project really doesn't matter, why have my daughter's worried about it for the last week and taken two days to pick the right outfit for the presentation?
Oh my God...are high school boys going to judge this thing?
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| posted by Kelly @ 5/06/2004 07:45:00 AM |
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| Wednesday, May 05, 2004 |
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I got my copies of the book yesterday. I was like a little kid at Christmas opening that package. Even though I knew what the pictures looked like and I knew the stories (because I was lucky enough to get to read the manuscript before everyone else), I was still excited to see them in an actual book. It was incredible exciting to see my name on the cover and to see my illustrations with the essays. And as much as I hate having my picture taken, I was really happy to see it in the book. I even liked it.
I sat looking at that book for quite awhile last night. It is now sitting on my new bookshelves (built by my incredibly talented husband). I did not put any other books in these cases yet. I wanted this book to be the first. Now I can't wait to fill it with more books that I have written and illustrated.
After looking at the book for awhile, I started to criticize my work. I started to find all the mistakes and things I could have done better. At a time I should have been celebrating, I started to pick myself and my art apart. But, then another wonderful thing happened that proved to me that I am growing as an artist.
I suddenly realized that, yes, I could do better now because I have better equipment and more experience , but that should not take away from what I did. When I drew those pictures I was proud of my work and I did the best I could at that time. I also started to remember all the nice compliments I have received and so many of the things I have been learning started to come back to me. Don't judge the work, just do it. The more you write (or paint) the better you get. Practice makes perfect. So many quotes and things I've heard and learned came back to me. In that moment I realized that I am starting to change. That I am an artist and I am worthy. I do deserve to be here. And that my work will change, grow and improve as I continue to learn. That doesn't mean the first work isn't good.
Anyone who wants this can have it. I am living proof. A year ago I could not even imagine that something like this could happen to me. A year ago I wasn't drawing or writing (except in a journal). Once I took steps toward my dreams, things just started happening and falling in to place. Has it always been easy? Of course not. But it is possible, you just have to try. For years I talked about wanting to be a writer and an artist, but I didn't do a thing about it. As soon as I took real steps toward it things changed.
Most of the time we don't see the changes within ourselves as easily as we see them in others. It is a nice feeling to know that I am getting to know myself and becoming comfortable enough with this new me to see changes.
It is also a great feeling to believe in myself. It took me a very long time to see that I had to believe do this before anyone else could. |
| posted by Kelly @ 5/05/2004 08:29:00 AM |
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| Tuesday, May 04, 2004 |
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Random Bits of Funniness (At Least to Me)
In other words, I don't know what to write today. This is what came to mind as I sat here thinking.
The Doughnut Police
When I was pregnant with my son, I gained an extraordinary amount of weight. I lost count after 60 pounds. The last few weeks of my pregnancy the Doctor actually put me on diet. It wasn't that extreme, he just suggested that I stop eating junk food. The nerve! I made the mistake of telling my husband, and he watched me like a hawk (for the sake of the baby of course).
There was an unopened pack of chocolate covered donuts in the house, but after I saw my husband eating one, I thought I could sneak one without him knowing. I didn't know I was married to a master spy! After I ate the doughnut, and got rid of all evidence (not a crumb left), I felt that I had successfully outwitted the doughnut police.
Acting as innocent as I could I sat watching TV and the husband asked, "How was the doughnut?"
Acting very offended, I said, "What doughnut? I didn't have a doughnut!" I said, .
"Then why is the box opened?"
"You had one earlier."
"Yea, but I didn't open the box."
"Yes you did, I saw you eating it. You ate it right in front of me."
The package was made in such a way that he could get the doughnut out of the box without actually opening it. He had set me up! He thought he was so smart. But how smart is a man that irritates an overdue, overly sensitive, food deprived pregnant woman? It is the last time he ever tried that.
No Candy in this Aisle
When my daughter, Michelle, was 12 we were grocery shopping and as I headed for the checkout she said, "Mom, you can't go in that aisle."
"Why not?"
"You have candy," she said, very seriously.
"So, what."
"But the sign says, "Parents, no candy in this aisle!"
As Kelci approached the aisle with her candy, Michelle (very impressed with her new found knowledge) figured she pass along the joke and as she pointed to the sign, she said, "Kelci, you can't come in this aisle!"
Kelci just looked at her as if to say,"You can't be serious!" and promptly explained to her what the sign really meant. They might look alike, but there are ways to tell them apart.
Marathon Shopper
Stupid things make me envious. I wish I could be one of those people that was organized enough to stock my cupboards so I would only have to go to the store once a week.
The other day I ran into some people I know at the grocery store. They had a full cart of groceries and were heading to the checkout. I got that little twinge of jealousy as I ran past them half asleep, randomly throwing stuff into my cart. Yes, once again I had forgotten to stock up on milk and coffee and an angry mob, throwing dry cereal, had chased me from my house. I made a mad dash through the store, and made a quick exit and found the same well prepared couple parked next to me loading their groceries into their car, and the wife commented, "Boy, that was fast!"
"Yeah I always do a warm up lap, I have to come back for the marathon later!"
At least my sense of humor never runs out.
Do You Know Where Your Children Are?
I debated writing this one here, but it was funny to me. Hopefully no one takes it as a sign of bad parenting.
The same morning I made the mad dash to the grocery store, I lost my son. Well, I didn't actually lose him (he is after all over 6 feet tall and pretty loud, so that would be very difficult to do). I just misplaced him.
When I walked out the door his car wasn't there. I had heard him come in the night before. He talked to his dad, and with the car gone I assumed he had spent the night at his friend's house. Imagine my surprise when I found him working at the checkout.
No lectures, most of the time I can keep track of my kids. Besides I blame my son for this anyway. He knows I'm brain dead and he always fills me in on these things. Maybe I should punish him for being so considerate and not waking me up to let me know he was going to work. |
| posted by Kelly @ 5/04/2004 10:12:00 AM |
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| Monday, May 03, 2004 |
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It is Monday, and it is raining, and I gave up a project with a potentially huge payoff over the weekend and I feel happy, excited, calm and more relaxed than I have in weeks. So, am I nuts?
My guess is that some people will think so, but many more people will not. My opinion is that the project I was working on (no matter how wonderful it appeared on the outside) was wrong for me and I made the right decision by giving it up.
My desire to be creative lessened the longer I worked on the project, and I started to doubt myself and my artistic abilities. This started to spill into other areas of my life. I was moody, angry, easily irritated, always upset, I was short with people and I felt like giving up writing and art forever because they were not fun anymore.
I made the decision to quit the project on Friday and by Sunday I felt like a different person. I might have thrown away the winning lottery ticket, but I don't care. I got a glimpse of the person I might become if I continued and I didn't like that person very much. She was too much like the person I left in the cubicle.
Letting go of some things seems so hard and scary, but when I look back at things that I release I see that when I was holding on to these things was the time that I was scared and miserable. When I finally found the courage to let go things became easy. If something isn't working you need to let it go, so you can make room for something that will.
By letting go of this, I feel that I have opened up doors for bigger and better things. I can't wait to find out what they are.
Running UPDATE:
I made it through week one and today I begin week 2 . I will increase my running time to 3 minutes intervals and decrease my walking time to 3 minute intervals. It felt great to make it through the first week. At times, it was easier than I thought it would be and I was going to increase the difficulty by running more, but I stopped myself because this is why I usually don't complete things. I do more than I should too fast and then my enthusiasm wanes, so I am happy to say that I stuck with the plan and I am still excited with the training. I have to constantly remind myself that babies crawl before they walk and running comes after walking and falling many times. |
| posted by Kelly @ 5/03/2004 08:19:00 AM |
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| About Me |
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Name: Kelly Gibbons
Home: Dallas, Pennsylvania, United States
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